First Sunday of the Month: Holy Hour for Vocations

On the first Sunday of each month after the Noon Mass, the Knights of Columbus at Grotto host a Holy Hour for Vocations, with Exposition of the Blessed Sacrament.

I'll try to get these reminders out on the Thursday or Friday below so you can plan to stay. Not only can offer the Holy Hour up for Vocations, but you can offer up the sacrifice of your time.

This has been a custom at Assumption Grotto for many years now so you might consider putting it on your calendar. It follows the Noon Mass so if you normally go to 9:30, there is time to catch breakfast out, or some social time in the gym where we have hot dogs, hamburgers, sausage and other goodies every Sunday with few exceptions.

CHILDREN AND ADORATION

There is a transcript of an excellent interview with Fr. Antoine Thomas of the Congregation of St. John who has a special grace in helping children with adoration. This entire interview is worth reading whether you have children or not because Father's words apply to everyone. And, unless we become like children....you know the rest.

From a 2005 Zenit interview of the priest who created Children of Hope - a program that helps children to adore Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament.

Bringing Children to Christ in Eucharistic Adoration
Father Antoine Thomas Develops a Program for Kids

PRINCEVILLE, Illinois, OCT. 5, 2004 (Zenit.org).- Thanks to a French priest's vision and devotion to the Blessed Sacrament, hundreds of children are engaging in Eucharistic adoration and experiencing the real presence of Christ.

Father Antoine Thomas, 46, a priest of the Congregation of St. John, has been working in youth ministry for 15 years and began leading children's holy hours more than 10 years ago.

Now he has started a program, Children of Hope, that helps others lead adoration for kids.

The priest, who came from Paris, shared with ZENIT how children can embrace and be enriched by spending time with the Blessed Sacrament in their schools and parishes, and what adults can do to encourage the practice particularly during the forthcoming Year of the Eucharist.

Q: Why is it important for kids to engage in Eucharistic adoration?

Father Thomas: Jesus said, "Let the children come to me"; I think we had better obey and bring him the children.

Pope John Paul II said back in 1996: "I urge priests, religious and lay people to continue and redouble their efforts to teach the younger generations the meaning and value of Eucharistic adoration and devotion. How will young people be able to know the Lord if they are not introduced to the mystery of his presence?

"[...] By learning the words of the prayer of the heart, they will be closer to the Lord, who will accompany them in their spiritual and human growth. ... All interior life needs silence and intimacy with Christ in order to develop.

"This gradual familiarity with the Lord will enable certain young people to be involved ... and to take a more active part in Mass; for young boys, to be near the altar is also a privileged opportunity to hear Christ's call to follow him more radically in the priestly ministry."

The Holy Father continues to stress this importance today.

What we learn as children will remain in us and help us to stay close to Jesus......[continue reading at Children of Hope]

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Catholic Answers Live: Children's Hour - Monday 7:00pm EST

Don't skip over this post because you're an adult!!!

Matthew 18:1-4

1* At that time the disciples came to Jesus, saying, "Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?" 2 And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them, 3* and said, "Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Whoever humbles himself like this child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

I was listening to Catholic Answers Live on internet radio on my laptop Thursday between 6-8pm EST when a child called in asking a question. After that question was answered by apologist Jimmy Akin, the host, Jerry Usher, mentioned that on Monday during the second hour, he will be having the children's Q & A.

That second hour from 7-8pm will feature guest, Fr. Antoine Thomas who has worked wonders with assisting kids in appreciating our Eucharistic Lord. Father, with his French accent even has a way to help adults see the faith through childlike eyes. I realized that when he spoke to adults at the EWTN Family Celebration (you can order the DVD at EWTN in this link). He starts out as if talking to children, but as an adult who listened to him, his message got deeper and more profound, yet was very simple. His grace and love just shines right through, but he doesn't pull any punches about what parents should be doing to help their kids understand Jesus in the Eucharist.

ON EWTN INTERNET RADIO
You can listen to it live on Monday night in the 2nd hour of Catholic Answers live on EWTN Radio at 7:00 eastern standard time (see time in NY and compare to your area of the world at this website). You can listen to it anywhere in the world over internet radio - on desktops and laptops, provided you have a decent connection speed. Just put your mouse over "Radio" at the top and click on "Listen Live".

Catholic Answers Live is available on many Catholic radio stations, including Ave Maria Radio out of Ann Arbor Michigan. Read below to learn how to listen live on EWTN radio on the internet.

PODCAST AVAILABILITY
You can also catch it for about a week after by going to EWTN's multimedia page for podcasts and downloading the MP3 file for listening at a later time. They have an XML code that can be used to subscribe for podcasts so you can sync it and leave it on your iPod.

Catholic.com also collects a week's worth of Catholic Answers Live podcasts.

DVD'S BY FR. ANTOINE THOMAS
If you can't listen to the show, and even if you can, I highly recommend that parents purchase some of the DVD's of Fr. Antoine Thomas, and use it along with taking time with your children to go to adoration chapels. There is no better way to help them understand the Eucharistic Lord, than to spend regular time, even if it is only 15 minutes, to visit Jesus and simply adore Him. The best prayer of all is where we ask for nothing, but give Him our all.

DVD's are available from the Children of Hope online catalogue. These videos are a "must have" for parents wanting to deepen their children's awareness of Jesus in the Eucharist, as well as their own. You can also get some of these DVD's from the EWTN catalogue.

US & CAN PERPETUAL ADORATION CHAPELS

If you would like to know where you and your children can adore Jesus in the Eucharist, go to this website for listings of perpetual adoration in the US and Canada. Perpetual adoration means it is continuous around the clock.

There are many more parishes like my own which offer limited adoration daily. Assumption Grotto offers adoration Monday through Saturday, and on the first Sunday of the Month. It is held in a small side chapel and you will need to call before you go to get entry instructions. It is open from around 9:30 until 6:30pm at which time Benediction takes place. On "First Fridays", adoration takes place in the parish church. Funerals and weddings can make it start late or end early. From the Grotto News:

We need more people to be Adorers. If you can commit to one hour per week or be a sub when someone is absent, please call Sr. Gemma at the Convent (527-4416) or Phyllis at the Rectory (372-0762)

Is adoration at your parish and not listed in the listing for perpetual adoration? List it here in the comment box. Let us know if it is perpetual or limited in hours. Provide an address or google-map link so people can find it. Feel free to list adoration times and places from other countries.

Another option is to set the filter to adoration in the "additional look-up options" at Masstimes.org. Select your country and follow the prompts. It may not be completely up to date, but could give you some leads on something near your home.

More info on Eucharistic Adoration at RealPresence.org

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Kids and the Mass: "They're not as stupid as we treat them"

Carolina Canonball at The Crescat has a great post up. I will share the contents of it here, but follow the link to the blog to read through many interesting comments.

... its amazing what a difference environment can make.

I haven't made the official parish change, but for over a month now my son & I have been attending mass at the Abbey. Solely from the perspective of a parent, the difference in my son's attitude toward church has changed dramatically.

There is absolutely no conversation before mass at the Abbey. The atmosphere leaves itself to nothing but prayerful silence and nothing less is expected. Even the tone of the mass is silent, slow and deliberate. You can't help but concentrate and direct your focus.

Every one is well dressed and makes an effort, something rarely seen now-a-days. It is obvious why these people come to mass, not for some social hee-haw but to celebrate the mass. Period.

Now you might think something this 'rigid' might not appeal to a small boy or be for him like excruciating torture... the effect is profoundly the opposite. He is never more quiet and well behaved then when in mass.

Surprise. Surprise. Our children are not as stupid are we treat them.

Go read....Great Expectations

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Video Game Addiction.....and it goes to Mass!?!?!

Many of us already know how addicted kids (and even adults) can become to video games. There is an excellent article in the Opinion Journal of the Wall Street Journal by a parent explaining just how bad it can get, and how difficult it is to break the cycle.

My wife and I aren't entirely inept parents--our 6-year-old seems fairly well-adjusted anyway. Back in October we established for the older boys strict screen-time limits. It was then that we discovered the true extent of their addiction. They ranted and raved and cursed and even threw things--almost as if demons had taken possession of them. These are classic withdrawal symptoms; they craved a fix. When we installed parental controls on the computer, our boys scoffed. It took them about 15 minutes to disable them. We've become so desperate that we may have to get rid of the computers entirely, though that may hamper their school work.

Something jumped out at me in the article. I have actually seen - not at Grotto, but at "St. Suburbia", kids with Gameboys at Mass. The author discusses this, as well.

It turns out that we're not alone in our predicament. A parent down the street confided to us that his 12-year-old son was so obsessed with video games that he wouldn't take even a three-minute break from gaming to go to the bathroom--with unfortunate results. The other day we saw a kid at church, in a semi-trance, going down the aisle to Holy Communion while clicking on a hand-held Game Boy. Talk about worshiping a false god.

Fr. Perrone has written on these kinds of topics in his column. If you spend any time at Grotto you will soon learn that all of the priests preach frequently on the need for moderation, even in good things. We can become addicted to almost anything. A hobbyist can spend so much time on a hobby that family and relationship with God are hindered. An athlete can join so many leagues that he has no time for his kids (or lead in divorce, which I have seen after one man was on 3 or 4 different baseball leagues and even let it interfere with finding a job). Someone can become so obsessed with fashion and shopping that more important bills don't get paid and the family goes into debt.

Moderation goes hand-in-hand with mortification of the apetites. Those apetites can be anything. If they aren't controlled by us, they end up being in control, which is the essence of addiction. It's in taming the little things, that we learn to tame the bigger things. Grotto priests have often encouraged us to make small sacrifices on a daily basis and offer those up. It could be saying "no" to a piece of chocolate just as you are craving it and reaching for it. It could be sacrificing time in front of the television to go visit a sick relative. There are so many opportunities to practice if we are willing to see them.

If we let the tail wag the dog with ourselves, how then can we expect the children around us to learn how to wag the tail? Parents especially have to set examples and talk about mortification and how it can be used like prayer when the pain of not having something at a given moment becomes perfect as an offering to God for some great cause. Perhaps a child could offer up that sacrifice of not playing a video game for a poor child in some other part of the world whose only toy is a carton of some kind. My point is that this is not only for the priests to teach. The fact that an entire generation of kids could get so out of control shows that the culture does not encourage mortification, nor do our churches.

Shows like "The Nanny" have become popular among young parents, struggling with out of control kids and in the end, it is always predictable. It's about making tough choices for your kids and learning to weather the temper-tantrums. The parent whose child can't fall asleep unless Mom is in the room, has created a situation in which the tail wag's the dog. The child is not in control of himself, but his emotions and wants are controlling him. "The Nanny" shows how to break the cycle, and it is painful for the parents.

I'm not married; I have no kids and you can tell me that I don't understand, as I've been told so many times before by parents when I've mentioned this: Parents are afraid to parent their children.

I wonder if the boys discussed in the article have regular, daily or weekly chores. If they did, they would have less time for video games and learn critical life-skills, like how to wash a load of laundry so Mom isn't still doing it for them in their twenties.

Letting "wants" control us is not just a problem with kids. It's a problem with all of us and even priests have become afraid to discuss it. There was a time when Catholics heard this from the pulpit regularly, as we do at Grotto. I recall nearly falling from my pew during sermons for months after coming to Grotto (half from knowing the priest was hitting home with reality and the other from trying to contain my laughter at just how true his words were).

Some feel it is bad on the self-esteem. Those are the people who walk out thinking the priest was negative (and probably have the greatest problem controlling a single child). However, we need our priests to be more concerned with the salvation of our souls, than with preserving our self-esteem. I pray for the day when you can walk in any Catholic Church and expect to hear the priest explain the importance of virtue and mortification. Save the self-esteem speech for those in hell because they're the ones who will need it. True self-esteem is built through virtue and mortification.

Lack of moderation comes in many forms, but I must say that the video game craze, be it on TV, computer or handheld, is one of the most visible among youth today. I would encourage you to read the entire article: Teenage Zombies


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Shhhhh........The Secret to Quiet and Still Children at Mass

I found Grotto's young children to be among the most well-behaved at Mass

What is the secret?

Photo taken during Assumption Day 7:00pm Mass by Jeff Williams (2006)

See details here for 2007 Assumption Day at Assumption Grotto

Ok, don't let the little ones know about this......Shhhhhh

Perhaps when you have visited a more traditional Catholic parish, you notice that there are big families with well-behaved kids (and parents hardly break a sweat). Then, you reflect on what you see in the majority of Catholic parishes - some families can't seem to keep one child in control without toys, food, and lots of chasing (and lots of sweating). By the time Mass ends, mom and dad need a nap. What gives?

I couldn't help but feel for a young mom - Jennifer - who admits to bringing the Cheerio's to Mass (at the advice of priests among others) in order to help keep the child quiet. As I read her comment and the response others had to it, I realized that many moms (and dads) today, don't know the secret - a secret I learned through the grace of God by observation soon after discovering Assumption Grotto in 2005.

There are exceptions to what I am about to share with you and I will admit that the Noon Mass at Grotto has a little more kid-noise than the 9:30 and perhaps it is because there are more families with kids at the later Mass. My observations came from the 9:30am Latin Novus ordo.

Here is what I wrote in the comment box in a blogpost by Fr. Z.

Jennifer:

It’s unfortunate that there have not been good examples to learn from, and solid advice passed on as to how to handle small children in church.

Perhaps this may help you and others, but I concede it must begin from infancy. I learned it by observing some families in my parish where there are many large families (6+ kids and many with 8-10+). I marveled at how still and quiet the small ones were during Mass (there are exceptions, but there is a trick I discovered).

One day at the 9:30am Mass a young woman was holding a baby (6-8 months old) in her arms during the prayers of the faithful. She had her head down and the baby was getting a little active, touching the face of the woman. My eyes caught the action because it was in front of me. After several times of trying to get attention, the baby stopped and seemed to be content just to sit there and look around. I suddenly realized that I was witnessing something very significant: Many families at Assumption Grotto send a clear message to their children from a very young age: This is God’s time, not yours sweet one. It’s a gentle message, but one that works when used early.

If you give a baby attention in any way during Mass, barring something very serious needing your attention, the baby will demand more and not be able to sit still.

I then looked around the church and saw in the back several parents walking with their babies. None of them were paying attention to the babies. They were either focused on the altar, or had their heads down in prayer. I kept looking around a few more times and noticed the pattern.

The following week, I was right behind another family of four with two children around 3.5 and 5. The little one kept standing on the kneeler and turning around at me. The father very gently turned the little girl and pointed to the altar. This was repeated 3 more times before the little girl seemed to give up. At no time did dad show anger or impatience. I think he would have done it 100 more times if need be.

By the time these children reach 5, 6, 7, they have no problem getting through a 1.5 hour Latin Novus Ordo without cheerios, PS2’s, iPods, trucks, dolls or other such things.

Once again, there are exceptions at Assumption Grotto. IMHO, those who do as described here were the experts. No one will convince me that a mom and dad of 10 quiet kids in a pew is wrong about not giving them attention during Mass. If the parents do so, they have taken their attention off of God who should be at the center of Mass, while enabling their kids to do the same.

Don’t feel bad though – no one has talked about this or taught it so how could you know? Hopefully, it catches on. It’s the same principle used by the TV nannies in getting the kids to go to bed on time without hastle.

Bottom line: The more attention you give them, the more they will want. The more I think about how I handled my own nieces and nephews at such times, I must admit that the cheerios and toys were simply ways to lessen my work. Look at the example of the patient father with the 3.5 year old. It took work - far more work - and patience - than simply handing the child a toy or something to eat.

I should add that I don't think it is impossible to teach a toddler these things that should begin in infancy. Feed the child well before Mass. During Mass, sit somewhere that the child can see follow the examples given here. If a loud temper tantrum ensues, don't give up - perhaps whisper in his or her ear that Jesus really needs someone to love Him at the moment and he is lonely for us to give Him our attention. Lead by example because if you are distracted during Mass, then so will the child.

If you have a newborn or are expecting, do try to do this from very young.

OTHER BAD INFLUENCES
Another thing I noticed is that grandparents and family members can be terribly bad influences because they like to smile and make goo-goo faces throughout the Mass. I know, I use to do it to everyone else's children. Whatever you do, don't go to a parish like Assumption Grotto or other more traditional parishes where the secret is in execution and make goo-goo faces at someone else's child. You may break the very good thing those parents are trying to teach: This is not your time, it is God's time. Parents: don't hesitate to talk to family members and let them in on the strategy to not give the children attention during Mass, even with a glance.

OLDER CHILDREN
It's a trick we've all used at one time in our life: The restroom trick. God help us if parents fall for this, unless the child has medical problems that are known. Ensure your kids go to the restroom before Mass and tell them that they need to give God the full hour. It is my understanding that at Grotto the altar boys must be able to "hold it" through Mass, barring illness of course. If they aren't capable of holding it, they won't be serving. If in doubt, watch your child at play and see how long he or she goes without a restroom break. I've witnessed children play for hours after drinking a half-pitcher of coolaid until their eyes and ears are watering. Of course, it also helps to not allow such a child to drink a bottle of Coke 30 minutes before Mass.

I hope this works for someone. Give us some feedback with how it works if you are going to try it or are already an expert at it. What works, what doesn't work?

BTW - thanks to Deacon Greg Kandra for starting this discussion with his post on "Bulletin announcements I would like to see...." You can always get to the Deacon's blog via my sidebar section for Blogging Priests, Religious, & Deacons.

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Childhood Memories: Who do you love the most?

When I was very young - probably 4 or 5, my father would tuck me in bed at night and ask me, "Who do you love the most?"

My answer would always be the same (you can trick children so small again and again, so I was put to the test many times over the next few years and this helped it to sink in).

"I love you both the most?"

What else could a child say?

My father would say, "Wrong answer, you are suppose to love God the most".

Back then, I didn't realize just how profound Dad's lesson was. However, when we look at the many decisions we must make daily, if it is not rooted in love for God first, then sometimes God gets placed second. For example, a young person with a vocation may not follow that call because mom or dad are not happy about it.

There are many applications with this profound question and answer. It has stuck with me and guided me for many years.

Dad died in October of 1991. He was devoted to the Holy Rosary and truly received one thing he prayed for: A happy death. It wasn't without pain, but with closeness to Our Lord and the Blessed Mother. He also prayed that Rosary daily for his children and others.

Thanks Dad.

Saturday morning with EWTN Kids

Sometimes when I'm working around the house I'll just put on EWTN TV or Ave Maria Radio (on my computer when I'm upstairs), and listen as I work. In these past two years since I started taking my faith more seriously, I've learned alot about the Catholic faith doing this. Other times, it is good to simply work in silence - something I've been working at even moreso now, than in the past.

This morning, as I prepared a large pot of chicken soup to share with my brother and his son - both of whom have suffered with the flu the last couple of days - I turned EWTN on. As soon as I saw the cartoons, I nearly changed the channel, but something prompted me to watch for a time. I'm glad I did. It was a real contrast to my "butterfly-and-me" catechism of my youth. If I had young kids, I would seriously consider getting the videos or taping the Saturday lineup of kids programs to watch with them.

The hour worth of programming that I had on, while different shows, all carried a common theme: Reconciliation. When I first tuned in, Image of God - a new program - was on. The teacher held a dialogue with the children and it focused on laws and why we follow them. She spoke about following all lawful authority - parents, teachers, even aunts and uncles, as a way that is pleasing to God. She then explained how parents, out of love, often ask children to do things they may not understand and God expects us to follow their wishes. In a like manner, so it is with God. We may not understand all of his Commandments, or Doctrines of the Church, but we must follow them. Actually, this is the highest form of faith - to accept and follow a Commandment or teaching without understanding it, out of pure love of God and trust in Him.

Between programs, instead of commercials, they played these short 5-minute clips of cartoon stories from the Gospel. Included was the story of the Prodigal Son. Another was aimed at prayer and how we must be like children. There were other short clips built into EWTN's Faith Factory. In "Hey Brother Leo", the children got a very short, but effective lesson on the Trinity using a simple lightbulb and its elements. As is always good in teaching, Brother Leo Mary, kept repeating - "three unique persons in one God". He also explained how we ought not get caught up in common heresies involving the Trinity. His visual was actually quite interesting, even though we all know that there is no single analogy that can fully help us to understand the Trinity. I also got a glimpse - for the second time - of a short clip by Fr. Antoine Thomas who spoke on the subject of sin very briefly, but effectly. I've seen something previously on children's adoration which impressed me. Click here to see a list of videos available from Children of Hope.

There was a 20 minute cartoon involving two young boys who were best buddies that was excellent. It used common sins committed by children to teach about forgiveness and confession. One kid - Philip - was a whiz at learning. He hid his report card from his parents because he cheated on one question and got caught - causing a failing grade. He wanted to be perfect and couldn't approach his parents. He spoke to a priest who explained the sin of pride, but the boy was still afraid to approach his parents who eventually confronted him and forgave him. At the same time, his best friend had stolen a brand new basketball from him - intercepting it at the post office as the other was waiting for it through the mail. It was a birthday gift and the ball was from a reputable team. This boy - Manuel - found himself unable to sleep and eventually went to talk to an old monk at a nearby monastery. The monk explained why he couldn't sleep and why he felt so miserable. Then he told him he needed to return the ball to his friend and apologize, while explaining the need to also seek forgiveness from God in Confession. The boy asked why he couldn't just confess to God on his own and the monk explained to him the gospel story of when Jesus gave to the apostles the power to forgive sins (John 20:19-23).

As I came up stairs, the sisters of Mary Mother of the Eucharist - based out of nearby Ann Arbor, Michigan, were about to have their children's program begin - Truth in the Heart.

You can buy these videos from the EWTN Catalogue

Faith Factory's Image of God

Other multimedia selections can be found here

Now, if you don't have cable television, but have access to the internet, you can watch any EWTN program live on the internet. I do this all the time when upstairs because I do not have a cable box there. Granted, it is a small window, but streaming video works fine - unless you are on dialup. Just go to the EWTN site and put your cursor over "Television" and pick from the options.